Xanthie's Story

I've been really blessed to share each of Bethanie's, from Green and Grateful, birth stories. We have shared Bethanie's other three Birth Stories here, here and here. This story is of her fourth and most recent birth experience!

Xanthie's Story

by Bethanie

I think Xanthie was trying to outdo her sister, but didn’t quite make it! Aisling was 10 days late, but Xanthie didn’t quite make it that long. She arrived 7 days after her due date. In this home, the boys seem to arrive early and the girls late! I guess they need the extra gestational time for beauty sleep!
This labor was super fast, which I kind of expected and secretly hoped for, but it was definitely faster than I thought. Still VERY intense, but so relieved to have it completed so quickly!

So to start at the very beginning, on Saturday the 3rd, we had the day completely free and it was so nice not to have any plans to be able to spend time together as a family. It looked like it was going to rain in the morning, so we decided to go to the mall and walk and then let the kiddos play in the playground area. We did walk the perimeter of the mall… both floors, but unfortunately they were remodeling so the kids area was completely torn up.

The kids were disappointed, but we certainly didn’t have the meltdown that I partially expected. We had a gift card for Chipotle, so we decided to leave the mall and drive around the corner to get some lunch and do some more walking around Fairfax Corner since the sun had decided to come out. We walked some more and then listened to some live music in the square and let the kids play in the water fountain.

It was so nice not having a schedule and just letting the day play out. I really didn’t get any contractions out of all the walking which is what I was hoping for, but I did lose part of my mucus plug that night… so I guess I did get a little something out of all the walking!

Sunday we went to church in the morning and then enjoyed a relaxing afternoon with my parents at their house and with my sister and her family who were in town from Kentucky. It was great seeing them and enjoying another beautiful day! I think it was only in the 70s which is unheard of for August in Northern VA!

I felt a little crampy… just that the braxton hicks were stronger, but nothing anywhere close to anything I’d call labor. They weren’t regular at all and wouldn’t even say they were painful. My Mom was on call to take the kids when labor did start so I contemplated leaving them for the night, but didn’t think I was that close to having a baby that they should stay.

Then early Monday morning around 3:45/4am I awoke having to go the the bathroom which is a little abnormal for me. Usually I don’t have to wake up until 5am or after, but I didn’t think too much of it. However, once I got back in bed I couldn’t go back to sleep. I started having contractions that were 10 minutes apart. Just like period cramps. I still wouldn’t have even said they were painful… just annoying enough I couldn’t get back to sleep. I woke Brian at 5am and let him know that I thought we were gonna have a baby sometime before lunch time! So I asked him to start filling the pool to make sure it was ready for when I was ready to get in. At 5:30 I called my Mom and asked her to pick up the kids around 6:30 so that she wouldn’t get stuck in rush hour traffic.

When she got there around 6:30 my contractions were about 4-5 minutes apart and only about 30-45 seconds long, and uncomfortable, but not intensely painful. In fact I found out later that Mom told my sister she didn’t think I had any contractions the whole time she was there to get the kids. She hung around til about 7am. As soon as Mom left with the three kids the contractions increased to 2 minutes apart and still not intense, but stronger.

I called Peggy (our midwife) and was able to have a normal conversation with her through the contractions. She wanted to know if I wanted her to come now. I said it was up to her. I didn’t feel like she needed to be here, but I also said that once I wasn’t the one calling her because the intensity had increased… by that point she probably wouldn’t make it. So she said she would get ready to head out.

Things started to increase and at 7:45 they were strong enough that I got in the pool and didn’t really want to carry on a conversation with anyone. Grunts and one word answers was about all anyone could hope for! Brian was still finishing up a few things and adding a bit more hot water to the pool. Brian then hopped in the pool with me and I was so glad to have him there.

The midwives still weren’t there and I could tell it wouldn’t be too much longer. I had two really strong contractions though which I could feel Xanthie’s head moving down through my pelvis. I remembered feeling the same when Aisling was born and was hopeful it wouldn’t be too much longer. During the second of those two contractions Mayanne (Birth Assistant) arrived. At the end of the contraction she asked if i wanted to be checked and I said no. I knew the head was right there and I wanted to push with the next contraction.

Next one came and I pushed and her head emerged. I said something to that fact and Brian said Mayanne looked at her gloves and then at me and back at the gloves and then just came over to the pool! Next contraction shoulders and the rest of her were born. 8:33 Mayanne arrived and 8:36 Xanthie arrived! Peggy didn’t get there for another 10 minutes!

It was super intense but I’d much rather it be quick!

Thanks to my wonderful husband who cheerfully got up at 5am to quickly get the pool filled and do whatever he could to serve and care for me as I progressed through this labor. He was so encouraging and knew what words I needed to hear. He worked hard and quickly to get things together and then cared for me as the end neared. I always love to see the joy and excitement in him as the end nears and as the baby joins us! I couldn’t have asked for a better man. God knew my needs and provided a man to suit that perfectly.

I’m still in awe at the miracle of birth and rejoicing in the daughter that has newly joined our family.

Thank you for rejoicing with us!

Xanthie's mama, Bethanie, has a wonderful blog, Green and Grateful, where she writes about her days spent as a mama to her four beautiful children, frugal living, delicious food and homeschooling. Stop by and say 'hi!'

If you are interested in sharing your Birth Story here on the Radiant Birth blog, feel free to Contact Me.

Simon's Story

Happy Friday everyone!
Enjoy your Birth Story!

Simon's Story

by Pamela

I had what I think was my first contraction around 7:15am while I was cuddling in bed with my two older boys.  I didn’t necessarily believe it was a contraction since up to this point I had had three nights of contractions that went from about 2am until 3am and then stopped.  The day before I went into labor I felt terrible; my body ached, I was in a tough place emotionally, and I truly thought I was going to be pregnant forever.  

After I got out of bed I went about my morning trying to keep time on my contractions.  I called Thad (my husband) around 8am and told him I had a few contractions but I couldn’t keep track of their pattern; they were somewhere between 10-15 minutes apart but not consistent.  He said he was going to leave the office right away but I told him I wasn’t sure if this was it.  He said he’d rather be home than miss anything so he came home.  I was standing in my kitchen trying to keep track of my contractions by my last made calls/texts to my husband, doula, and midwife.  By 8:45am my husband came home and he asked his mom to stay home in case she needed to take the boys out of the house.  I remember walking to the bathroom (I was making very frequent trips to the bathroom that morning which was a good indicator that I was truly in labor) around 9am and had to hang on to my dresser to get through a contraction.  My midwife, Marilee, called to check on me and said she was on her way and my doula texted me to tell her when we needed her help.  Around 9:30am my friend, Amanda, came by to pick up the cookies for our cookie exchange that morning and my mother in law was getting the boys and dog into the car and I had a long, intense contraction that had me on my knees hanging on to the banister with tears in my eyes.  Active labor began!!  Dash (older son) was very concerned seeing me in pain and I was grateful that they would not be there for labor despite my initial wants of having them in the house for labor and/or the birth.  I wouldn’t have been able to concentrate on labor if they were there.  I remember Marilee walking into the house while I was groaning through a contraction and I heard her say, “Those are good sounds,” and it finally occurred to me that this kid was going to be born that day.  It was around 9:45am. 
  

I made it downstairs in between contractions to see Thad busy at work filling the aqua doula, Marilee setting up supplies, and I helped by setting up my iPod for music and setting up my diffuser (I used doTerra’s Balance blend for grounding).  I was having a hard time getting comfortable through contractions because I couldn’t quite tell where I was having pressure.  Was the pressure on my bottom or my perineum or my back? I couldn’t tell, so I couldn’t figure out what position to be in for maximum comfort as I worked through my contractions.  All I knew was that I did not want to be standing up, so I tried being on all fours (which was tolerable) or sitting on the toilet and/or the birthing stool (which was more tolerable but not perfect).  I even tried hanging off the corner of my sectional but it was not quite right.  My doula, Mary Beth, arrived around 10:15am and she jumped right in and helped ground me through my contractions.  She helped me relax and used essential oils (we used Iris Oils 4 pack for Childbirth) for scent and massage.  Thad sat behind me to hold my shoulders down during contractions (so I wouldn’t tense up) and Mary Beth sat in front of me between my legs.  They took turns feeding me pineapple and/or pomegranate seeds and giving me sips of water to keep me hydrated.  I felt encapsulated in love.  

Around 10:45am after I went to the bathroom I stood there crying.  In pain, I cried worrying about whether or not my son would love me.  In retrospect, I realize this irrational worry was a sign of Transition, and apparently so did everyone in the room because Marilee, Thad, and Mary Beth held me in the bathroom as I cried.  When I got out of the bathroom I complained that I couldn’t get into a comfortable position and Marilee wisely suggested the aqua doula. 
 

Once I lowered myself into the pool I had instant relief.  I can’t believe I didn’t have a pool with all my babies!  The water was warm, soothing, and I instantly felt like it lifted everywhere I was feeling pressure. The counterpressure was so helpful in managing the pain, it was just amazing. We labored in the pool as the contractions became stronger – at this point I was still able to talk or joke a bit between them; I distinctly remember joking with the birth team over my husband’s dismay when Celine Dion came on the playlist.

The period for talking soon ended – the break between contractions was shortening and the contractions themselves were getting much stronger. I remember asking Marilee why I wasn’t getting a break, and what I should be doing, and she kept saying ‘You’re doing it.’ Sometime around noon I was really working hard – I remember feeling tired for the first time, and concerned about how long the labor would take – would I still have the energy to push effectively at the end? Mary Beth kept me hydrated with water and Gatorade, and I continually sought positions that would relieve pressure from my back. I remember leaning back with my husband’s hand supporting my back, leaning back in an almost hurdler pose with one leg extended, squatting upright and swirling my hips, and finally shifting to all fours in the pool, which would become my final birthing position.

At one point well into active labor, I did ask if there was anything for pain relief, and after a brief silence, Marilee replied ‘You’re sitting in it.’

In retrospect, now I know the various positions and movements were all what Simon needed me to do to safely enter the world. While I was deep in active labor, I had to release the negative thoughts that spun through my head. I questioned whether I had done enough. I had thoughts of being ill prepared, of his size, of my abilities to actually get him out, of possible rupture, and I realized I was at a point of no return, and in releasing those thoughts, I started to unintentionally push. My midwife does not dictate pushing; she allows the body to do what it needs to do. With Dash’s birth, she told me when to push because she saw that I was getting tired and needed to help me focus. This time, my body just did what it needed to do, and unbeknownst to both my husband and me, I was pushing.

I noticed Marilee was behind me by the pool, and Leigh Ann (her assistant) was holding tools of some sort. I had no concept of time at this point – I don’t know exactly when I began to push, or for how long I pushed. I don’t know if it’s because I was in the water, or because the bag of waters was intact, but I had no idea how close he was to being born. I remember Mary Beth asking my midwife if she ‘catches in the water’, (she does) and it hit me that we were going to meet him soon. It’s a crime that in some places women have to get out of the tub to deliver – I can’t imagine how hard that must be.

My groans became grunts, and bearing down with each contraction became instinctive. Whatever people say, you truly poop a baby out. The sensation is low and deep, and no other sensation can be compared to it other than pooping.

Thad was in front of me, supporting my weight and helping me focus. His strength and faith in me took away any fear I had in pushing. It started to burn up towards my clitoris, and I still had no idea where he was. My midwife never told me how much she could see, but in watching the birth video, he was beginning to crown. My midwife put her hands on me to help guide him out, and when she touched me, I was afraid that I was going to suck him back up into my body. When I watched the video and saw the moment she touched me, I didn’t realize just how close he was to being born.

I was pushing and Marilee told me that my bag of waters was intact, that there was a lot of vernix in there, and that his head was almost out. Thad told me that the time to slow down (to prevent tearing) was coming, but all I could feel was pressure and stretching – I didn’t realize his head was already out. It took my doula and husband telling me that his head was out before I grasped, emotionally and physically, that he was about to be born. My sac was still intact at this point and Marilee asked if I wanted her to puncture it – I told her to do whatever would relieve some pressure. On his way out, she made a small puncture to help him glide out.

While waiting for the next contraction, I felt stretched to the absolute max, and Thad and I maintained steady eye contact to help me stay open. It was during the next contraction that he was born – I was still bearing down and pushing when I heard Marilee say, ‘He’s out – reach down and take your baby – be careful, his cord is short’. I couldn’t believe that I was actually pulling him to my chest. I rested him on my breast, he let out a small cry, and the flood of emotions completely overwhelmed me. What broke my trance was Marilee saying to me, ‘You just birthed a direct OP baby.’ For those of you who don’t know what that means, he was posterior, sunny side up, and he came out gently, which is extremely unusual for babies in that position. In fact, part of the reason why Julian was born by Caesarean is because he was posterior.

Once he was born, we completed all the particulars - getting out of the pool, cutting the cord, prenatal exam, passing the placenta, and of course ordering some pizza. The entire birth team was in high spirits, the sun was still up, and they would be home in time to have dinner with their families – Simon Edgar Winston was born at 1:06pm. He was 7 lbs. 5 oz. and 21 inches long.  ‘Edgar’ is for my father.  Simon was born on the 11^th anniversary of his passing, which was also our original due date.  I couldn’t think of a better way to honor my father.  ‘Winston’ is our street name since he was born in our family room.

We had the obligatory family text and Facebook post, and by 4pm it was just the three of us, snuggling on the couch and soaking up every moment of our perfect birth and perfect son.  The postpartum period was an emotional roller coaster.   For now, I will return my arms to my little 3-week old babe waiting for mama’s milk and snuggles.  Life is good.  

If you are interested in sharing your Birth Story here on the Radiant Birth blog, feel free to Contact Me.

Aisling's Story

We featured a Birth Story from Bethanie of Green and Grateful a couple of weeks ago; here is the story of her third child!

Aisling's Story

by Bethanie

I woke up at 1:30 in the morning with some cramping, but nothing strong or really very painful. I laid in bed for another 30-45 minutes to see how far apart they were. Each contraction was about 5 minutes apart, so I called Peggy (our midwife) to give her a heads up just in case it started to get any stronger or progress more. She advised me to call back in about an hour and give her an update. An hour later things were still about the same so I had Brian start filling the pool with hot water and decided to wait a bit longer before I called her. By 3am my contractions were 1 minute long and 1 minute apart and getting stronger. I called Peggy and told her she should probably come before too long.

Everyone arrived around 4am and of course the contractions slowed down almost to a stop! Peggy checked me soon after she arrived and I was only 3 cm… a little disappointing! They were 7-10 minutes apart, no longer painful and only about 20 seconds long. It stayed like this for about 45 minutes and I was getting discouraged that I had called all these ladies and woken them up for nothing. We had the idea of trying the steps to see if that would help things to start moving again. I did the steps twice and then went into the restroom and sat on the toilet for a while as well and things started to pick up again! It was a feeling of “YEAH! Things are moving!” and “Oh, No, not labor again, I’m not sure I’m ready for this!”

Tonchi and Koa (older children) woke up at about 5:30 so we called our friend Judy Trostle to come and get them. They both wanted to keep checking on me to make sure things were ok. By then I was in the pool and not once did they ask to get in with me. I didn’t mind having them there and was able to give them hugs and kisses and chat with them between contractions.

Judy arrived around 6:30 to pick them up. Koa was not very happy about leaving and made his voice known, but Judy didn’t seem to mind. Later on she said he cried a lot on the way home, but was fine during the day and had a great time playing with Tonchi.

By 6:40 labor was really intense and I thought I should be almost done, so I asked Peggy to check me again. She said baby was -1 station and I was 8 cm dilated. I was a little disappointed. I was hoping to be 9 or 10 cm and baby close to being out! However… 15 minutes later at 6:55 Aisling Michelle was born! It was a SUPER intense 15 minutes. I could actually feel her head moving through my pelvis and it WAS NOT comfortable! As she started to crown I started to push just because I could tell she was right there, but I didn’t have any overwhelming urge to push!

I was SO thankful to be done and SO glad she was here! Brian was REALLY surprised that it was a girl! He had to double check just to make sure! I didn’t tear at all and the bleeding wasn’t too heavy either. She was born in the birthing pool underwater and I also delivered the placenta in the pool as well. Afterwards Brian and I took a shower and I think that is the best shower I’ve ever taken in my life! The warm water felt great!

After the midwives left I slept for about an hour and then Mom came out to see her before she had to start teaching her classes. Brian and I then had the afternoon to rest and relax and I think Aisling and I slept for about 4 hours! Later that evening we had A LOT more family to visit and see the baby! Mrs. Trostle also brought the boys back in the late afternoon and they were SO excited about their new baby sister!

This was another amazing birth! Just the way I had hoped and with close friends and family there! It was an amazing night. All who attended were each needed in their own special way and I’m so blessed they sacrificed precious sleep to be there to support us! And again, Brian was just what I needed when I needed it most. I love the way each birth has drawn us together and created a stronger bond between us. It’s so good to know he is there when i need him!

We praise God for a safe and healthy baby and for the first girl baby in the family! My mom has 5 grandsons and now a granddaughter! What a treat! She is going to be tough, but I’m guessing she will be the princess as well!

Aisling's mama, Bethanie, has a wonderful blog, Green and Grateful, where she writes about her days spent as a mama to her four beautiful children, frugal living, delicious food and homeschooling. Stop by and say 'hi!'

If you are interested in sharing your Birth Story here on the Radiant Birth blog, feel free to Contact Me.

 

Tonchi's Story

Good morning Mamas!

Am I the only person who always thinks of a Mother's labor on Labor Day weekend?!
I have another Birth Story to share with you today - enjoy!

Tonchi's Story

written by Bethanie

I guess it all started about a week before he decided to arrive. Exactly one week before, I started having a few contractions on our way home from Ocean City, MD. They weren’t anything regular or painful, so probably just Braxton Hicks, but I hadn’t had any of these the whole pregnancy.

Then the next day I lost my mucus plug and continued having small contractions throughout the day and night, but nothing with consistency. Over that same weekend I continued to have contractions off and on. I then decided to go to work come Monday and continued through Tuesday and Wednesday. Each day at work was fine and I had no problems working, just feeling a little more tired than usual.

Thursday morning I was up bright and early. I wasn’t supposed to work until 11am, but I was up at 6:00 am. My water broke! At first I just thought I had had an accident, since I hadn’t gotten up to go to the restroom in a few hours. But… as more time passed I was sure labor had started and that it was my water that had broken! Brian went ahead and left for work around 7 and he promised to have his phone nearby in case things started to pick up! Well, they did! By 7:30 I was having contractions about 5 minutes apart. I called Peggy the midwife at 8am and she said to keep her updated. I also called Brittany (sister), Tyler(God-mother-to-be) and Michelle (best childhood friend) to make plans for coming over. None of them answered their phones, so I wasn’t sure if we would have anyone here! I also called Brian to turn around and come home. He had just gotten to the office! While he was on his way home, I started changing the sheets on the bed and putting the plastic underneath.

Also the birthing pool wasn’t yet set up, so I started working on that until the contractions got too strong and I couldn’t. By the time Brian got home, contractions were about 3 minutes apart and I was lying on the bed upstairs. Brian agreed to finish setting up the pool, but he hadn’t watched the video with the instructions, so I came back downstairs to tell him how to do it. Finally, we had it set up and started running the water to fill it up!

Brian tried calling all of the ladies again, including Peggy and told them it was about time that they come. Tyler and Peggy arrived around 11:00 and Brittany arrived around 12:00 with Michelle.

By that time my contractions were about 1 minute apart – I think – if I can remember correctly and they had gotten pretty strong. By 12:30 they had the pool filled and I went downstairs to try it out. It was about 110 degrees and was quite warm. Brian didn’t get in right away because it was too hot. The midwives as well agreed that it was too hot and the ladies (Tyler, Brit and Michelle) started taking hot water out of the pool and adding cold water. I kept asking for cold wash cloths for my hair and face, but I didn’t want to get out of the water because it was so relaxing. Tyler had made some labor aide which tasted like lemonade with honey. There was also magnesium in to help give me some energy. Brittany had brought Stromboli for lunch and I had some of that as well. It really tasted good at the time! Labor continued to get stronger over the next few hours.

When Peggy checked me to see how dilated I was at 1:30 I was only 4 cm. I was hoping for more than that, but I just reminded myself that it really didn’t matter!

Around 3:00 she checked me again and I was 9 ½ cm dilated! YEAH!!!! I was really having a rough time though. I really felt nauseated and the contractions were very hard. Peggy tried to push the last little piece of cervix out of the way, but it just didn’t want to budge. One of the midwife students had me walk up and down the stairs and then hang around Brian’s neck to try and help the baby move down. I know I was complaining that “I can’t do this any more. I’m done. I’m out of energy.” The midwives also gave me a few herbal medicines to try and help me relax and give me more energy to keep pressing on. I know I really didn’t want to do it any more, but I kept reminding myself of the options. If I wanted pain relief then it would have to be an epidural and I really didn’t want that, and if I wanted to be done, then I would have a C- section and would have to go to the hospital and I definitely didn’t want that. So… the only other option was to suck it up and continue on.

Through the entire labor Brian was incredible. There is no way I could have done it without him. He was very encouraging and very compassionate. I never felt like he was patronizing or talking down to me or making fun of me. He knew what to say when and what to do to help me relax and help me to continue on. He was by my side the entire time and was in the pool with me the whole time as well. I do plan on having a home birth again, only if he will be there. I could never have done it without him, and that is the truth!

I labored on the toilet upstairs for a while as well and for the last 30 minutes the contractions were a lot less frequent and I got some much needed rest. Then I just knew the baby had moved down. I felt and could barely touch the top of his head and then more of the amniotic fluid came out as well. It was nearly 6 0’clock. 3 hours of transition is really hard, but by God’s grace I made it!

I went back downstairs to finish laboring in the pool. As soon as I got in, I started to feel like I was ready to push. After 20 minutes of pushing, baby boy Tonchi was born! We sat in the pool for probably the next hour. Peggy said she didn’t think she had any other mothers stay in the water for that long afterwards. I wanted to deliver the placenta in the pool to help keep the mess all in one place. After holding Tonchi for probably 30 minutes the cord was cut by Brian and I started to breastfeed him to help pass the placenta. Within 30 minutes it was out and we had a biology lesson from Peggy. Brenda got in on it too.

Breanne and Brenda (other two sisters) arrived soon after the baby was born. Dad actually showed up around 5:30 and didn’t want to come in, but dropped off pizza, sushi, and salad for us for dinner. He then went home, and once Tonchi was born he and Mom came back.

The rest of that evening we had a lot of visitors! I felt GREAT! The midwives left around 9:30 and before they left they checked us both out and gave us instructions for the next couple of days. They said I tore in about 3 places, but nothing that needed stitches. In no way would I say that the labor was easy, but I’m so glad I was able to give birth at home. After a long day of hard work, it was so nice to be able to sleep with my husband and our new son in our own bed. God has certainly blessed us with a healthy beautiful baby. We think he is just perfect! We are so excited for this change in our lives and all that we have to learn and enjoy.



Tonchi's mama, Bethanie, has a wonderful blog, Green and Grateful, where she writes about her days spent as a mama to her four beautiful children, frugal living, delicious food and homeschooling. Stop by and say 'hi!'

If you are interested in sharing your Birth Story here on the Radiant Birth blog, feel free to Contact Me.